Wednesday, July 8, 2009

On the Nike dunk cover-up: would Kobe have pulled a LeBron?

Much has been written about the video footage that was confiscated by Nike after Xavier's Jordan Crawford dunked on LeBron. This is a ridiculously stupid move in today's interwebs age, where the cover-up becomes a bigger story than the video ever would have been. It leaves our imaginations to wonder what really happened. From my friend Adil:
The real question is if after this happened LeBron took out a whiteboard and diagrammed for Anderson Varejao how he should have been blocking the camera angle, while yelling at Daniel Gibson for being less talented than he, while thinking about the newest diamond encrusted Mercedes he would have to buy his lady because of all the shame he caused her, while crying deep down in his soul because fundamentally he is alone in this world and no one will ever truly love him for him.
This of course sparked a debate about whether Kobe would have pulled a similarly arrogant move. As my friend Tyler pointed out, Google turns up about 85,000 results for "Kobe arrogant" as compared to the 47,000 results for "LeBron arrogant." Of course my friend Babak then pointed out that LeBron actually has more arrogant hits when adjusted for number of years in the league. (I am actually getting different numbers when I Google these things... but you can't argue with the reasoning behind this method of study.)

I should mention that Adil, Tyler, and Babak are all starting a video blog project soon called "Handsome Lawyers Talking About Sports." Also, one of them is a terrorist. Stay tuned.


Adil said...

Thanks a lot, Alana. Now Kobe is going to track me down and try to intimidate me with his soul-dead, existentially-alone tears. I don't know if I can take that face to face.

Anonymous said...

I would love to see some handsome lawyers talk about sports.

Dewey said...

If the video blog doesn't feature any Thizzle, I'ma wreck house.

Tyler said...

Don't get too excited, Anonymous, we're far from handsome lawyers. I look like the love child of Jeff and Stan van Gundy.

Also, Kobe would have done the same shit as LeBron and tried to bury that tape ... no doubt. Only difference is that Nike wouldn't have done if for Kobe, so he'd have to get Ronny Turiaf to do the dirty work. Poor Ronny is so desperate for Kobe's love and would do anything for him.